


I would like to contribute to the chaos

by AssumeEveryoneWithASwordIsQueer



Series: Just wild knights defying the world [1]
Category: Arthurian Mythology
Genre: Autism, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone Is Gay, M/M, Sharing a Bed, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:07:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27500506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AssumeEveryoneWithASwordIsQueer/pseuds/AssumeEveryoneWithASwordIsQueer
Summary: Galehaut liked that Lancelot was so different. Liked how he could ride his horse fast because the champion liked the wind on his face. Liked how Lancelot never thought twice about the scars on his chest, and how his eyes lit up as he rambledBut all good things come with a price
Relationships: Galehaut/Lancelot du Lac
Series: Just wild knights defying the world [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2009782
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	I would like to contribute to the chaos

"It's no big surprise you turned out this way when they close their eyes and pray you will change"- Twin sized mattress   
Lancelot had tears running down his face before either of them had lay down on the too small bed in the inn with doors that didn't lock, doors that didn't lock and windows that drafted. It was better than sleeping out in the snow as they had the first night of their quest, and at least they didn't have to sleep on the floor like Dinadan. Galehaut wanted to blame the queen, but he knew it had been the only place she could find.   
He held his hand out and waited to see if Lancelot actually wanted to be touched. It was hard to tell when he got like that, but this time the knight leaned into his large hand with little hesitation. Galehaut brushed away the tears as they came down like burning raindrops.   
"What troubles you, my love?" he asked gently. Lancelot released the death grip on the woolen blankets to tap his ears and hands. That was one thing that bothered Galehaut- Knowing the closest he would come to hearing Lancelot speak would be his cries. Guinevere had helped him make a language of hand signals that Galehaut had quickly caught on to.  
"Okay, do you need gloves or is your whole body bothering you?" He asked. Lancelot shook his hands and followed the half giant's gaze to the leather gloves sticking out of his own pocket. Galehaut let go so he could slip them on. A door squealed open and slammed shut down the hall. Galehaut barely noticed the sound but Lancelot whimpered, folding himself into an even smaller ball and pressing the heels of his hands over his ears. Galehaut began signing, knowing his own voice was probably too loud, even at a whisper.  
'Is touch okay?'he signed and held his arms out for a hug. He was never sure, but slowly, so as not to make the unstable bed frame squeal, he slid into Galehaut's arms. He laid down and attempted to stay quiet, but he didn't miss Lancelot's discontented sound when something fell in the room they shared a wall with.   
It was quiet for a long while, the only sounds being from outside the room, and a small sob. Galehaut ran his hands up and down Lancelot's back, the only thing he wouldn't be but for at that particular moment.  
The two had a strong respect for what the other was or wasn't comfortable with, so Galehaut felt a little surprised when he felt the knight lay his head right on one of the scars where his breasts were removed back home in the Distant Isles.   
'What are you doing?' He signed. Lancelot had his arms around Galehaut's neck and didn't seem inclined to move, so he freed an arm and traced the letters on his hand. It was hard to understand in the dying light of the candle. He could almost hear Dinadan singing a ballad about it.  
'Your heartbeat. It drowns out the hurt,' had been what he said. Galehaut didn't need to ask. Lancelot was almost trapped in his own head, only freed with smudged stories, vague hand gestures and his art that few had patience for.   
"I know how you struggle sometimes. If you still want, I can see if the physician who fixed my body can do something to help you. To at least free your voice." Ye whispered, as it had grown too dark for the sign to work. Galehaut knew it was a tough issue, especially since Guinevere explained it to a few visiting nobles as the knight having a wraith in his throat. Galehaut hadn't appreciated being called a medium, either so... Thoufhts aside, given the sensitivity, the reaction was no surprise. Lancelot pushed on his shoulder roughly, not so much a punch as he tried to shove him.  
The night's body no longer shook against him, and no tears were leaking through his thin shirt. Lancelot traced letters onto his palm again, and this time, Galehaut moved his hand with Lancelot's finger to "read "faster.  
'I don't need to be fixed, I need to be understood'  
Galehaut smiled and pressed him close. He really always knew the answer. Lancelot wasn't broken. There was nothing to fix in the first place. The only thing that would come out of that would be an unrecognizable lover and guilt.  
"You're right. I like this. Not when the slightest thing makes your mind attack you like tonight, or when you go 100 miles past your threshold for interactions, and never getting to hear your voice, but you are you. Don't think for a second something is wrong with that." Galehaut said, still in a whisper. Lancelot was more than alright at that point, but he felt the need to chastise himself for such a stupid idea.  
As his eyes began to slip closed with the last of the candle light, he remembered how captivated Lancelot was by those things.  
"Look at the way the flame dances, can you imagine Dinadan singing about it", he said. As much as he tried not to tease his brothers at the table, it was what Dinadan deserved for comparing him to a wolf, though Lancelot shoving the bard in a dress had been quite a sight.  
Lancelot laughed, a light thing that fluttered a like a bird through his so often locked shut lips that ring in the room like the chords of a harp. Galehaut was too close to sleep, but he would be shocked the next morning when he realized he'd never heard Lancelot laugh before and he had been the one to draw it from the knight.  
Lancelot would release a flustered laugh and turn as red as the Rose's he left next to Galehaut's bedroll.

**Author's Note:**

> Lyric snatched from a song by the front Bottoms. Lancelot has a sound hypersensitivity and he's nonverbal in this because writing on Mobile makes dialogue hard.


End file.
